Stupid Radio Contest

It's common for radio stations to have contests. They usually give away something interesting, and if you're lucky and constantly listen to the radio, you may win. Whoopee! I don't do radio contests, but I am guilty of radio-surfing, so I hear not only all the different styles of music, but all the shite that's going on with each station.

This is one of my favorite contests (and the only memorable one, if I'm being honest). I'll tell you in my own words what it is:

Hey, lucky person (female), would you like new boobs? Well guess what? You can win a $6000 breast enhancement! Yay!

At this point you may be thinking, what's the big deal? I'm sure there are a ton of ladies who want bigger breasties. Don't get your knickers in a twist over it, you prude.

But that's not the point. I have a few arguments against this, actually.

1. They hijacked an Avril Lavigne song, What the Hell, and changed the words to "All my life I've been stuck with these, but noooooooooow I've got DDs." Did the small-chested Avril really give them permission to boob-ify her song? After I stopped laughing, I heard more for this contest, and I was a little offended. I hate being offended.

2. In the one of the promos for the contest, they tell you that when men say they like small breasts, they're LYING. So get a boob job. Basically, get bigger breasts in order to please men. Am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?

3. I know there are women who do want bigger breasts for whatever reason, whether it's for reconstruction purposes, vanity, or they want men to lust after them. Hey, it's your thing. Everyone is different. But the women I know who were naturally gifted with larger chests aren't all that happy. One woman I know suffers from back pain because of it, and when she was younger she always used to wonder whether the guys she was dating were dating her for her or for her breasts. I mean come on, men do, you know. I felt bad for her.

4. In today's lovely economy, aren't there more useful things people could win instead of breasts? Instead of giving away boobs, why not just give away the $6000? Or a thousand bucks worth of gas cards? You know, stuff that normal people could actually use?

So maybe I'm being too fussy over it, but eh, I think it's ridiculous that they're still running it on the radio. I wonder if anyone has complained. It is a tad sexist, you have to admit. Plus, every time the butchered Avril song comes on, I enjoy it, and then I feel guilty and unsatisfied because it lasts only a few seconds. And then I'm angry because they're teasing me with the fake version of a catchy song when they could be playing the real song instead!