The Greasy Strangler

I'm trying to find the right words for this, but I'm all over the place. I'm really just here because I want to force this on people. Except children. They should go to bed and not come out until it's safe.

The Greasy Strangler is one of those movies that makes me feel gleeful, while also making me gag. As far as bad movies go, this is intentionally all kinds of awful, but it's done so well that it works. IT WORKS.

Basic plot: Ron and his son Brayden run a disco walking tour. Ron has an unnatural love of grease. Thus he is...THE GREASY STRANGLER, a serial killer who...yeah, he strangles people while covered in grease. Father and son soon vie for the love of Janet, one of their customers. And it's sexy as hell. This makes for a great date night movie.

Tips for preparing for some grease:

* Do not eat. Maybe you're strong, maybe nothing bothers you and you're just a full-blown deviant. But if you gag on your toothbrush, you will gag on this.

* Get ready for a lot of dick. I mean loooooads of penis. So much penis. You might enjoy it in the most non-sexual of ways. Honestly, prepare your face for full-frontal nudity. And butt nudity. All the nudity.

* Speaking of nudity: old man farts.

* Oh right, and graphic sex.

* And eyeball stuff. I'll stop there.

My Grade: Guys, I don't even know my own name right now. So I give this 50 unicorns and a poisoned lollipop. Which might translate into a B+.

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