Unfortunately, it was too early in the day to drink when I watched this, but alcohol should be on the list of prerequisites for this pile of romcom poo.
Okay, so let me be honest before I start thoroughly trashing this: I watched it because I knew it would probably be terrible. I even forced my friend, someone who likes romcoms way more than I do, to watch this with me. Even he had nothing good to say about it. Granted, maybe he was also mad at me for torturing him, but I choose to believe this film produces feelings of disappointment and confusion all on its own. That being said, I still expected there to be some redeeming qualities. Maybe the romance would be legitimately adorable, maybe the characters would be so lovable that the audience can forgive the bad cliches and writing. Hey, maybe the sexual chemistry would be on fire, and become one of those guilty pleasure flicks. Alas, this was not the case.
Basic plot: Gabriela, a pretty, ambitious woman in San Francisco, loses her job, dumps her commitment-phobic boyfriend, and enters a random ass contest to win an inn in New Zealand (which really only requires a 400-word essay, because apparently that's how life works). Which doesn't at all resemble one of those pop-up ads that's just waiting to give you malware and spyware. Yeah, totally legit. Only a woman of superior intelligence, such as Gabriela, would be able to see through its virusy facade. I swear I felt myself contract herpes when she clicked on the "You WON" screen.
Anyway, life is beautiful. She flies to New Zealand based on that one pop-up. Wearing Italian leather heels (ah, cliche!), she treks around with her luggage, struggling to get to her mysteriously free inn. And who does she run into? Hunk-a-hunk Jake! He's so nice, and he tries to be helpful, so naturally she hates him immediately, and is determined to be rude. Yeah, girl, you...um, you wave that pseudo feminist flag...? This is actually a running theme with Falling Inn Love. I don't know how convinced anyone involved with this movie was, or how hard they tried, but the "villains", or rather the people they try to write off as vapid, antagonistic characters, are all pretty nice. Gabriela's coworker enthusiastically offers her a job, and I guess we're supposed to be like, "How DARE he"? I don't know guys. And the woman who wants to buy the inn off of Gabriela, because this has been her dream for basically her whole life? Nein! She offers to buy it, meaning Gabriela will have sold the inn she got for FREE, making bank without spending much money at all, save for the flight (although I don't remember that being specified). But hell no! Instead she's going to spend money she doesn't have and...flip it? Wait, what? That...doesn't make sense. This is why Netflix should offer you free wine for this movie.
"So yeah, I never intended to stay in New Zealand or whatever. But, you know, instead of making loads of money by selling this sweet property that I won, imma just spend many a thousands of dollars to fix it up, and then be conflicted because of the hot blonde guy I've been mean to for no reason. But also, let's just casually forget that I owe people money for the repairs. Oh wait, they're so nice that they're giving me shit for FREE? Damn, I sure get a lot of free stuff. I deserve this."
You know what? Let's talk about the romance aspect of this. It is, after all, a romcom, and I have been promised "feel-good" and whatnot. Sadly, I will have to look elsewhere. There is zero chemistry between Gabriela and Jake. I don't blame Christina Milian for this. Yes, her character is annoying, but you know what's worse? Trying to bang a robot. Because Jake is a robot. I didn't see it at first, but once they really started to showcase him more, I realized that the poor, handsome man doesn't have a personality. It's tragic. Like his backstory, except worse. Look, I get it. You put two attractive people together and assume they will create magic. And then this movie happens. I cared so little about these characters that the only thing that would have fixed it is if one of them died a shockingly violent death. But no.
Falling Inn Love plays exactly how you expect it to, happily giving the audience every cliche it can muster along the way. My low expectations were not even met. That being said, I guess I got what I asked for.
My Grade: Does this deserve a grade? Not really. But for the sake of grades, I'll give it a D for dick. Because Jake probably doesn't have a dick, and Gabriela is going to dump him.
Okay, so let me be honest before I start thoroughly trashing this: I watched it because I knew it would probably be terrible. I even forced my friend, someone who likes romcoms way more than I do, to watch this with me. Even he had nothing good to say about it. Granted, maybe he was also mad at me for torturing him, but I choose to believe this film produces feelings of disappointment and confusion all on its own. That being said, I still expected there to be some redeeming qualities. Maybe the romance would be legitimately adorable, maybe the characters would be so lovable that the audience can forgive the bad cliches and writing. Hey, maybe the sexual chemistry would be on fire, and become one of those guilty pleasure flicks. Alas, this was not the case.
Anyway, life is beautiful. She flies to New Zealand based on that one pop-up. Wearing Italian leather heels (ah, cliche!), she treks around with her luggage, struggling to get to her mysteriously free inn. And who does she run into? Hunk-a-hunk Jake! He's so nice, and he tries to be helpful, so naturally she hates him immediately, and is determined to be rude. Yeah, girl, you...um, you wave that pseudo feminist flag...? This is actually a running theme with Falling Inn Love. I don't know how convinced anyone involved with this movie was, or how hard they tried, but the "villains", or rather the people they try to write off as vapid, antagonistic characters, are all pretty nice. Gabriela's coworker enthusiastically offers her a job, and I guess we're supposed to be like, "How DARE he"? I don't know guys. And the woman who wants to buy the inn off of Gabriela, because this has been her dream for basically her whole life? Nein! She offers to buy it, meaning Gabriela will have sold the inn she got for FREE, making bank without spending much money at all, save for the flight (although I don't remember that being specified). But hell no! Instead she's going to spend money she doesn't have and...flip it? Wait, what? That...doesn't make sense. This is why Netflix should offer you free wine for this movie.
"So yeah, I never intended to stay in New Zealand or whatever. But, you know, instead of making loads of money by selling this sweet property that I won, imma just spend many a thousands of dollars to fix it up, and then be conflicted because of the hot blonde guy I've been mean to for no reason. But also, let's just casually forget that I owe people money for the repairs. Oh wait, they're so nice that they're giving me shit for FREE? Damn, I sure get a lot of free stuff. I deserve this."
Falling Inn Love plays exactly how you expect it to, happily giving the audience every cliche it can muster along the way. My low expectations were not even met. That being said, I guess I got what I asked for.
My Grade: Does this deserve a grade? Not really. But for the sake of grades, I'll give it a D for dick. Because Jake probably doesn't have a dick, and Gabriela is going to dump him.
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